C A P I C O S T I A

Penn Branch Center, charming as ever! (Clockwise from top right) Penn Branch Liquors, CVS Pharmacy, Beltway Beauty and Star Pizzeria, below it. (Originally published, July 15th, 2009) She sits at the corner of Pennsylvania and Branch Avenues, this brick and concrete goddess. Our Penn Branch. She sits there, with a mouthful of meatball subs, twinkies and Cool Ranch Doritos and washes it all down with a Colt 45. She sits there, fixing the one good eye she’s got left on you, as your car makes a mad rush for the John Philip Sousa Bridge. For Capitol Hill. National Harbor. Adams Morgan. Cool places. Exotic places. Faraway places, where cafes litter the sidewalk. Where laughter, foreign accents and live jazz tease the imported air. Where people linger. Celebrate. Hook up. I cannot honestly say that I remember the last time I wanted to visit Penn Branch Center, the prehistoric strip mall at the corner of Pennsylvania and Branch Avenues, for anything, ..and I don’t know anyone else, who does, ...

What in Dante's Hell is 'Capicostia'? There's something about living here, ..in Penn Branch, Fairfax Village, Pope Branch, Dupont Park, Twining, Hillcrest, the Randall Highlands and probably Fairlawn, too, ..that's different than living in other parts of River East, and the culture-angst is something only we can understand.  When you think about it, the only thing separating us from Capitol Hill and everything the Hill represents - sophistication, culture, history, relevance, style - is a stupid bridge and a river, and, while it seems rather inconsequential, we all know it isn't.  Not in D.C. And, especially, not over there, West-of-river, ..in Capitol Hill, Georgetown, Downtown, No'Ma and Adam's Morgan. There's a fleeting anxiety among some of us, who live in the neighborhoods along Pennsylvania Avenue, that we're unfairly characterized as less intellectually sophisticated, less cultured (appreciative of history and the arts), less relevant a...